Why Am I So Calm?

Honestly, I have no freakin' idea...

I was having trouble sleeping all weekend worrying about cycling in July. That may sound ridiculous to some, but I have felt for months that in order to maintain my sanity, I needed to allot time for at least two cycles this summer. I would be comfortable trying a FET once the school year begins, but I wanted at least two tries (either two fresh or one fresh, one frozen) before returning to work. After all, the crazy IFer always has to brace herself for failure and have a Plan B.

Anyway, I was stressing out majorly that we wouldn't be able to cycle in July, I and I was basically powerless to do anything over the weekend. Now that it was Monday, I took charge and decided to do whatever I can to ensure a July cycle.

I started calling both Penn and Cooper at opening this morning. After leaving yet another message on the medical records office voicemail at Penn this morning, I decided to just go in person and push my way to my HSG and IF records. As soon as I got out of the shower, the IVF nurse at Cooper called me back with some good news.

First of all, I have a CD3 baseline ultrasound and bloodwork scheduled for early tomorrow morning. She seemed to have a protocol in her hands because she said that she would submit the order for my prescriptions today. She did say again that we were really down to the wire, but I told her that I was on my way to Penn for some records and she seemed pleased with that. She mentioned that we would be stimming with Menopur and Follistim, but upon hearing that we are self-pay patients, she said we may swap to Bravelle instead of Follistim so that we could take advantage of their H.E.A.R.T. pricing program. So, that sounds like we have a protocol, right?

Anyway, she said to wait by the phone for a call from Freedom Pharmacy in the event that they need billing and shipping information. After I got the release forms filled in for Penn, I went off to my part-time summer job of babysitting a precious seven year-old with Down syndrome, keeping my phone close by all day.

When I got home from babysitting and C came home from work, I recapped my discussion with the nurse and we decided to go ahead and call Freedom as I had not heard from them all day. Of course, just to throw another wrench in the gears, they have no record of us or any prescriptions. Luckily, they overnight all of their meds, so as long as I can get the nurses to put through the order tomorrow, I will have the meds by Wednesday. If I have to start stims tomorrow, I can either ask for sample meds or beg for a separate script for the fertility pharmacy in the same complex as the RE.

So, here's the same question again... Why am I so calm? Maybe I am just too tired from freaking out all weekend, or maybe I know it's just too late to worry. At this point, whatever is going to happen will happen. I am just hoping that everything is sorted out by the time I leave Cooper tomorrow and I can get my meds and get this show on the road.