As I posted before, the first day wasn't bad because the Valium seemed to have knocked me out and I took a pretty long nap. Falling asleep Wednesday night, however, was no easy feat considering that I hadn't done a thing all day and really wasn't tired.
As for day two, my mom took the day off of work, which I really didn't think would be necessary, but I was glad she did. I spent most of the day just reading internet articles and watching cooking shows on TV. I suddenly realized how limited I was in my activities, but she was always there to refill my drink, bring my meds, and she even vacuumed my house and threw in some laundry!
When C came home from work, he took over, but spent most of the time playing video games and tending to his new reptiles two storeys away in the basement. Hmph. He did make dinner, though.
Today was a strange day. I had all this new found freedom, but nothing to do! I usually keep busy with errands, but today I had nothing on the docket. Regardless, I had to get out of the house. I ended up having lunch with C, then driving out to West Chester and strolling around for a bit, then coming home.
For a busybody like me, two days of bedrest was pretty rough, but the next few weeks are going to be very strange. Now, I am not super-neat by any stretch of the imagination, but with two dogs and two cats, I am used to doing a fair amount of vacuuming, as well as lots of laundry, dishes and so on. Needless to say, these tasks are not exactly C's forte. It is going to be weird to rely on him to do all of these things until beta, as it specifically forbids lifting over 15 lbs, vacuuming and too much bending over in my release directions. This should be interesting...
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On another note, it occured to me today how much I would love to be busy caring for our child. My freedom today actually made me sad...
I have always wanted to teach, ever since I was in kindergarten, but I would be lying if I didn't acknowledge that the schedule would be conducive to raising a family. I always thought that I would be able to spend time with my children during the summers, and maybe even get out of work early enough each day to pick them up from school or daycare before my own mom ever could.
My husband, mother, father, aunt, cousin and brother-in-law all have either non-traditional or flexible work schedules that we always thought would reduce our need for daycare or babysitters. We always thought that my cousin and I could raise our kids together just like we were raised together and if they helped us during the school year, I could really take them for the whole summer. It's been our plan for years.
While I know that one can never fully prepare for the responsibilities of parenthood, my boredom just has me thinking about how I could be running around caring for our baby. The constant demands of IVF kept me busy for a while, but now in the 2ww, it's all I can think about.
Instead of driving around aimlessly like I did today just to get out of the house, I could have been shopping and crafting for a nursery or digging through bargain bins for clothes and baby items. I could have been at the local orchard petting animals with our baby or going to the free baby-friendly movies at the local theater. I could be scrapbooking pictures of our family or making handmade items for a nursery. I could even be crafting and creating art with my child.
When you're broke to begin with, then a little extra broke from IF treatment and just sitting here in the 2ww, it's hard to really enjoy your "child-free" time. Really hard. Especially when you're by yourself.
...And now that I have poured my heart out, I am going to get ready for this weekend's distractions. I am grateful to spend this evening with C and tomorrow with my mom, my cousins and my precious little-girl-with-Downs-whom-we-babysit, but I can't deny that I will be thinking about visiting Hershey and Chocolate World with our own kids while we are there.
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